


The Unsinkable Phil Lester

by orphan_account



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: 2012, Chris Kendall - Freeform, DAN AND PHIL - Freeform, Dan Howell - Freeform, New York, Olympic class, Other, PJ Liguori - Freeform, Phil Lester - Freeform, RMS Titanic, Ship, Southampton, maiden voyage, transatlantic crossing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2017-09-04
Packaged: 2018-08-11 18:58:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7903948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan and Phil purchase first class tickets on a highly anticipated reconstruction of a famous transatlantic steamer to take them to America, but has a century of technological progression only made man more arrogant?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Southampton

"Hey, Dan, wake up! Wake up!" Phil whispered excitedly into his friend's ear. Dan was in his bed, head almost covered by the black duvet in the dark bedroom. It was pitch black, just the way he liked it. Phil, however, was not deterred from leaning over the bed and prodding him even if it meant venturing from his own room, where the light of the morning sun flew freely inside, into the darkness of Dan's.

"Uh mhssphil whaddyou doin up so 'erly" Dan responded, voice muffled by the morning drowsiness and the reassuring duvet between his dream world and that of reality.

"It's the 10th, Dan, and it's already 8am! Get up lazy bones!" Phil jokingly demanded. At this, Dan's eyes cracked open to reveal the brown pearls soaked in redness.

Dan came back to reality. He sat bolt upright, losing the duvet off his chest but not caring. His mind was racing and he stated articulately and almost too quickly for anyone to understand what was running through the man's head, "What? Already? Phil please tell me you have everything packed and ready to-"

"Shh yes Dan," Phil cut across kindly, calmly placing two fingers across his distressed friend's lips to stop the frantic words spilling out. "I already checked our luggage through at Southampton last night. Just get ready, I even left some clothes on your door," he finished.

Dan lay back down slowly as Phil left the room, turning the light on before closing the door behind him. Dan's eyes stung at the intrusive and hard light entering his eyes, which contracted into his sockets in pain. But he couldn't let it get him down, today was the day. It was the 10th of April 2012 and he wouldn't let it pass him for the world.

Dan met Phil on the landing of their stairs, carrying nothing but himself with his hair combed back in an orderly fashion and the clothes that Phil had set out for him. They felt restricting and misplaced on him, after all it was a colour and style matched brown linen suit with a checkered and striped bowler hat and gray tie.

"Phil these clothes-"  
"It's just what Blue Star sent us, alright? Everyone will be wearing things like this."  
"But it feels weird..."  
"Maybe, but you look great, don't deny it."

Dan rolled his eyes at that, but thought that perhaps the people who really wore this crap a hundred years ago felt the same. Discomfort was a reasonable trade for the appeased looks of high aristocratic society.

A car soon arrived outside the flat, which the two boys jumped inside. The drive from London to Southampton only took some hours, by which time it was already a shocking 11:25!

"Dan, stop shaking, it's fine we'll get there," Phil reasoned. He expected Dan to shudder at the thought of being late, but wanted to preserve a sense of calm over the boy as it would help no one if he had a panic attack when they got to Southampton.

"We can always hop a ferry and catch it at Cherbourg if it comes to it..." Phil reminded him. It wouldn't be ideal, but at least it calmed Dan enough for them to listen to the driver.  
"No need for worry lads, we're making excellent time, in fact I could let you out here," the driver stated in the slow and drawn out Dublin accent which seemed to wash a coolness over Dan's visage.

Phil paid the man as he took Dan's hand to lead him away from the car and towards the docks. They were finally in Southampton.

Out of the distance, a tall black ring came into sight, at least 20 stories above the ground. Followed by another black ring. And then two more. All lined up beside each other. Then yellow cylinders came into sight beneath the rings. They had golden pipes attached to them, exhaling white steam and clouds from them, a glorious sight.

As the two rounded the corner, a large black surface came into view, a wall almost, towering high above them.

Phil's lips pulled into a very wide smile and Dan simply gazed, astonished, at the sight before him as his eyes caught the large brass letters riveted to the black wall.

T I T A N I C II

"Well it doesn't look any bigger than the Mauretania," Dan sarcastically commented in a light Yankee accent.  
"Oh Dan, it's over 100 feet longer than the Mauretania, and far more luxurious," Phil snapped back. The two shared a giggle over it, still smiling broadly. The ship looked every bit as big as any of the movies had said it was. The paint smelled fresh on the surface of the metal and the rivets, even if just for show and authenticity, looked as strong as they would have 100 years ago. The four funnels towered over the dock in all their grandness, desperate to push forward across to France and then out into the open water where they might breathe the fresh, oceanic air.

There was a glow about the entire dock as people rushed forward with bags, everyone wearing the clothing that the doomed passengers of 1912 might have worn. Men wore Edwardian suits and women wore everything from lavish Victorian floor length dresses, multiple layers of course, with broad brimmed, floral wedding cake hats to light summer dresses with thin, white gloves.

Dan and Phil walked past the bow of the huge ship, past the first funnel to the bridge leading to the doors in the side of the ship, where many other first class passengers were boarding.

The shadow of the magnificent funnel didn't dampen the men's moods as they passed through it as they were greeted by the passport controller at the gate and allowed through to the gangway. Dan looked over the railing as he left the dock and ascended the temporary ramp connecting the world of the past and his own. The water was calm and deep, lapping at the hull of the ship in a sort of patronising way. He ignored it and continued moving.

The two reached the D deck gangway doors, where the hard light hitting the black painted steel gave way to the softness of the beautiful interior of Titanic's first class entrance room. The clean tiles on the floor transitioned into lavish red carpet with an endless ornamented pattern woven in as they proceeded through a set of oak wood doors with intricate wrought iron swirls decorating their center space. It gave way to the reception room, where Phil immediately spotted the bottom of the famous grand staircase, it's large oak wood posts and pillars with their intricate carvings almost being overbearing. The center railing of the staircase held on top of it the strong bronze candelabra which glowed with every bit of glory that the original might have. The room extended for seemingly forever as Dan peered around the corners into the dining saloon in the next room which was separated only by a thin wall with three large, decorated glass arches.

"Phil, it's... amazing," Dan whispered, hardly able to get the words out.  
"They did say that they called it the 'ship of dreams'," Phil responded.

The two made their way up the staircase, marvelling at the wood carvings and paintings on every landing, the gorgeous curves of the bronze cherubs, the purity of white tiles of the landings. They reached the B deck where they arrived in room B-60.

"You know who was in this room?" Phil asked after they'd settled into the parlour of the suite.  
"No, Phil, who was it?" Dan responded, almost tired of Phil's endless trivia and overexcitement.  
Yet he couldn't get sick of how happy the ship clearly made him.

"The Macy's people!!!" Phil revealed, his eyes glistening in joy as he bounced around the room, admiring the dark wooden panelling, the fireplace even.

"No, they weren't on this deck, sorry Philly" Dan responded rather coldly.

Dan thought in his head for the first time since his sleep was rudely disturbed; 'I hope he doesn't find the private pro-'

"DAN AND I FORGOT ABOUT THE BALCONY THING"  
"Phil it's called a promenade-"  
"IT DOESN'T MATTER, LOOK AT IT!"

Dan rolled his eyes, at least in 1912 style, passengers wouldn't have an issue with copious consumption of brandy. It really was just distilled wine and everyone knew that Dan could down a bottle of it just in one 5 minute internet support group video - finding an escape from Phil on the ship would be no different.


	2. Leaving the Dock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's back... Well technically I didn't promise any updates and I did warn you all (all 19 of you) that the likelihood of it would be slim and so yet again.. I was RIGHTTT!! Okay, I do actually plan on writing more.. I won't promise to finish it because you know by now I'm terrible at that. I don't have a job, I'm not at uni, and I just got back last week from London on an extended holiday. I have a feeling that there'll be lots of time to fill with being complete trash or "rubbish" as it is in the UK.
> 
> One person asked me almost a year ago if I were continuing this work, and yes, for you I will feel inspired to complete it. Note: "FEEL inspired", not necessarily "BE inspired".
> 
> Thanks all, even if no one reads it Idc, this shit just got personal and I'll feel like the lazy piece of crap I am if I don't :))))

Dan felt slightly more confident about his attire now that he'd seen the other gentlemen sporting their own frankly ridiculous "costumes" as well. After sneaking carefully away from the small and cluttered room he was to share with a certain overexcited flatmate, he found himself standing in front of the same elaborate oak staircase again. The floating palace of first class and all its opulence was at Dan's fingertips, however he wasn't quite sure of where to go. Perhaps he felt intimidated; the bronze cherub on the centre piece stared at him intimately and he felt pressed by it to make a decision. He didn't often leave Phil alone, he genuinely enjoyed spending time with him. It was the prospect of sharing a room that small with him. Yes, that would be it.

"Excuse me, I'm terribly sorry to disturb your daydream," a terribly posh voice intervened, "is there something I can help you with ol' chap?" The man questioning Dan stood right in front of his eyes, barely a few inches from his face. Dan jumped at the voice. He backed away. But the man in front of him was not threatening, in fact his curled hair and sympathetic eyes told a different story.

"Yes um," Dan started, awkwardly shifting in place, "I'm good, thank-you, how are you?" Dan blurted.

The man only laughed at him before removing one of his brown leather day gloves and placing a bare hand on Dan's shoulder while he regained his composure. "Yes, I'm doing...quite well!" he admitted with faltering intonation as if caught off guard while his eyes flickered around the moody room. "Gosh, I didn't mean to scare you but you looked like a lost puppy," the man said, reverting to a more modern accent.

Seconds passed by while Dan fidgeted with his fingers and other passengers passed him by. What does a lost puppy even look like?

"Right then, I'm PJ - and no, do not ask what my actual name is. I didn't wanna scare you. I was just practicing my rich person accent on you, I promise," he hastily explained, "all for show," PJ added, laughing, as he extended his ungloved hand to receive Dan's sloppy and anxious handshake. Elegant clothes covered every bit of his body; everything from his brown leather brogues up his gray striped trousers to his matching jacket and waistcoat made him seem perfectly respectable. Dan certainly couldn't tell he WASN'T rich.

"Right, yeah, yes... My name's Dan," he started, "I was on my way up to the… uhm… I don't know where really."

"Well Dan, there's a lounge upstairs," PJ explained before switching to his posh imitation, "might a flowing tête-à-tête with an acquaintance of mine, accompanied by a beverage of the alcoholic variety, be to your liking?" PJ's proposal ended with a bow, as he offered his hand to Dan. The two laughed at PJ's excellently convincing and snotty persona, before PJ slipped his glove back on to link arms with the other boy as they ascended the staircase.

 

The A deck came into view as the two found the first landing, where the sun streamed from above through the heavenly glass dome installed in the ceiling. The calm sound of a string trio wafted through the air, a waltz of some description. Dan couldn’t tell you who wrote it. The two passed a slightly grander brass cherub on the centre railing, which looked over the room with a watchful eye. Dan noticed the sadness in the little angel-boy's eyes. Perhaps he didn’t like being outshone by Honour and Glory, two women featured on an illustrious carved clock at the top of the staircase.

They moved quickly to the lounge, where the waltz music from the grand staircase petered out and gave way to nothing but warm air and the light, orderly chatter radiating from small groups of glamourous women and a few men. The room was beautifully panelled with light oak and carvings of all sorts of musical instruments dotted around it. Perhaps most magnificent was the light shining from the boat deck above, unobstructed through the stained glass windows.

"Dan, meet Chris. I was still on my posh setting when I said "acquaintance", he's really an annoyance I'm stuck with," PJ said playfully as the three moved to stand around a small tea table.

"Trust me Peej, when aliens are finally proven I'll get out of your hair. Until then, you're going to have to settle for my friendship instead," Chris piped up.

"Aliens? Aliens are definitely real and I honestly wouldn't mind the probing," Dan stated, regaining his confidence.

"Whoa, Dan I don't think anyone on Titanic would have said that!" PJ joked, "You would be very wise indeed to refrain from such profanity, young man!" He continued in a shocked manner as the three laughed grossly, affording them stares from other passengers

"Excuse me, waiter! Three brandies please, and yes I know it's only midday," Chris very nearly shouted at a confused waiter.

 

A rumble from deep within the ship cause heads to turn all around the opulent lounge as the ship lurched forward unceremoniously, but with warmth of the sun fluttering through the windows and a glass in each of their hands, the boys didn't seem to care.

"'As long as the ice stays in the glass I don't mind', that's what I always say anyway," Chris pointed out. PJ and Dan agreed as they each took another sip.

The ship glided out of port and people rushed around on the deck beyond the room to get a view of those below on the dock. They were heading out to the horizon with nothing in the way.

 


End file.
